I am in my 30s and a mother to two lovely daughters. My youngest is one and a half, and the eldest is three and a half. As they are starting to play together and enjoy each other’s company, I am feeling much more relaxed and comfortable in my role as their mother. I think being a mother is the greatest honour and responsibility because children are the most important thing to me and are as precious as my life.
But motherhood is not my only role. I am also a business woman, working as a distributor of the French children's clothing brand Bonpoint in Australia with our first flagship store in Chadstone. And apart from managing my business, I am an amateur blogger and love sharing my fashion style, shopping hauls, snippets of everyday life and interesting finds.
I firmly believe that if it weren’t for becoming a mother, I wouldn't not have known my true innate strength. This is how life is! Every day reveals just how impermanent our lives are and as the children grow, they bring me countless little surprises. They also give me the courage and determination to march on, no matter how exhausted I am.
I regard giving life to my daughters as a form of good fortune, a gift for which they don't have to thank me for. I just hope that they can understand that I am the one who wants to profoundly thank them for giving me a new life. I have no expectations of my children, if children require fertile soil in order to bloom, I would willingly lay down and be that soil. ❤️
What was your favourite thing about the newborn phase?
When they were born, my favourite thing was looking at them, touching their little hands and feet, and chatting with them. I would tell them how lucky and grateful I am to have them in my life.
What did you find challenging about being a new mother?
The challenge for new mothers is more about dealing with the psychological change. As the Chinese saying goes: “Being a mother makes you stronger than before”. Being a mom is challenging and requires great courage. If you want to become a doctor you can go to medical school, and if you to like desserts, you can learn to become a dessert chef. But there are no schools to teach you how to be a good mom. You can only rely on yourself and your intuition.
How were you supported during your postpartum period and what would you change if you could go back in time?
When I gave birth to the girls, I hired a confinement nanny, and then down the track had a nanny to care for the girls. From the outside, it may appear that I had it easy. But I feel like I also lost a lot of time with my kids. If I could go back in time, I would spend more time with them as they grow so quickly. Every day they are growing up, every day is a new day, and I want to be beside them as I witness their growth.
List your top 3 essentials for a new mother.
- Trust and accept yourself. Give yourself space.
- Get enough sleep and eat nutritiously.
- Have the support of your partner and family and remember that you are not alone.
Are there any rituals or practices during your 4th trimester you'd like to share?
In China, during the confinement period we are not allowed to wash our hair and are required to wear a thick wool hat during this period under the instruction of my confinement nanny. Unfortunately this caused me to have migraines during my first pregnancy. When I had my second child, my confinement nanny allowed me take baths and wash my hair every day whilst also soaking my feet with Chinese herbs. She also performed moxibustion treatments on me. My body became very light, restored, and comfortable, and the migraines were cured.
Editor's note: It is important to remember that even when observing confinement practices, to be mindful of one own's constitution and making rituals suitable to one's lifestyle and make up.
See our Instagram post here.